I'm a Really Bad Girl =[

The following conversations happened January 22, 2007 at 5:30 pm. Gaisano Mall of Davao.

People Involved: Neym and Ex =[

I was walking along Gaisano Mall just for a stroll when I met with my ex. (The one who got his friend pregnant.)

We've been friends since after we broke up and that time, he was alone. Well don't get it wrong, he hasn't been separated with his wife; he was also from work that time.

We had this hi-hello greeting and he asked if he could treat me to dinner because it's been a long time since we haven't seen each other. So I said, we will just have a cup of coffee instead.

So yeah, we were talking about what happened to our lives and all, he said he already had 2 sons. I think it have been more than a year since we've seen each other so I was surprised that he actually was able to make a new one with her.

Then the conversation went into our past. On the days when we were together and when I found out that he got his friend pregnant.

(Conversations translated to English. Not the exact words but with the same thought.)

NEYM: Oh yeah, I almost killed you when you told me. I was like already starting to love you then you broke my heart.
EX: Well, I thought you'll never love me. I've heard a lot of rumors that there were more of us at once
NEYM: -laughs- Hey, even if I'm a bitch, I don't date guys at once. Give me some decency, please!
EX: That's what I thought considering the fact that you always go home with guys.
NEYM: AND GIRLS!!
EX: Yeah and you go drink and get drunk with them, and do nasty things together...
NEYM: Who told you that? I only do nasty things when I'm single. But I wasn't single that time, was I? I told you, even if I'm a bitch, I'm still a pretty decent person and I'm not a cheater!
EX: -nods- I know, I know you're not a cheater but you know the feeling that you don't actually value our love? The people who love you?
NEYM: Huh? What do you mean?
EX: You only want what's good for you. You don't even consider our feelings. You do things that make you happy and make us guys just like someone who follow you around and do your orders. You don't ask us what we want or even consult with us about what you want. I told you not to drink with guys anymore but you still do because that makes you happy but it put me in pain. You know what I mean?
NEYM: Selfish?
EX: -nods- Yes, Selfishness is what you've got. I'm not blaming you for everything, I guess it was just natural for you because ever since, you've always been getting everything you wanted. You've been spoiled; by your family, your friends and even your exes...
NEYM: -laughs- I didn't have an ex! You were that first one!
EX: Oh well let's say it was that way. So yeah, you also can't blame me if I did what I did in the past. To tell you the truth, I've also been hurt when we broke up, but I never regretted anything at all after my baby was born.
NEYM: So you're happy telling me this?
EX: I feel relieved because I know you're single now and it might help you in the future.
NEYM: -nods- Alright, thanks a lot. But you won't blame me if my heart will hurt, ok!

Yeah, after he said those words, my heart went hurting. I wanted to cry but it'll be too embarrassing to do so. So, I changed the subject and said goodbye to each other as I drank my last drop of coffee.

Really, what he said made me realize a lot of things. It may also be the reason why the man I loved left me for someone else. Because even though I thought I gave him everything, I know I still hasn't. Instead, I got everything that I WANTED, without knowing that he was in pain with it.

Then yeah, what my ex told me will help me in the future, I know. I know it wasn't something he said just to hurt me. I just know it.